You can eat the tape, but please don't swallow it!

Hi everyone!

I know it has been a while since my last visit, but I warned you that I was going to be busy! School is going well, my class for BHU is great, the second graders in my Sunday school class are amazing, and I went to the NAEYC conference in Dallas a few weeks ago. Finally I have a few moments to chat....

Last Wednesday was one of the most amazing days. Vivian Gussin Paley, the author of a dozen books on storytelling and play, came to Baltimore to speak to a group of teachers. We had been reading her books over the past 4 months, and were rewarded with a chance to see Vivian in action, as well as time to ask her all the questions that have been floating around our book club.

Oh-My-Gosh!

Wow!

Whoo Hoo!

Holy Moly!

I think I could easily sit here and write about the awesome feelings I had while watching her with the children, or while listening to her give her view on time out ("it really has no place in the early childhood classroom!"), but I know you want to hear all about what happened. So, in my best photographic-mind-weirdo-powers memory, I will recall it all for you.

First, I have to back up and tell you about the call we had (29minutes and 8 seconds) the day before she came in. I was sharing with her that the classroom we were going to visit, the one she would do storytelling in, was a 3's room. She said to me, "Do you have an older class?" I told her we did, but we had a few children for whom we haven't really gotten around to understanding their behaviors, and were worried. She reponded, now wouldn't that group give much more interesting stories? So, needless to say, our demonstration was with the 4's!

We met in a room other than the classroom, (there was a weird smell in the room due to some roofing work), so the children were actually in a conference room. I walked one of the children over to "meet my friend Mrs. Paley", and Vivian quickly shared with me "I'll take it from here, thanks." This is a teacher who knows what she is doing!

She began by telling the children that she was going to build something with the tape. She started to lay out the masking tape, and, having a bit of a time getting it to stick, she pulled and stepped and pulled until the tape was in a straight line about 8 feet long. The children were trying to guess what she was doing. Vivian stepped on the tape to make the adjacent stripe on the carpet. "I think she's making a square!" "No, I think it's a rectangle!" Vivian says, in her quiet, unassuming voice, "well, I guess we'll know soon, but one thing is for sure, it will be either a square or a rectangle."

Once the stage was completed, (Yay! A rectangle! That's what I thought it would be!) Vivian asked 4 children to please sit on the short side, helping them learn how to sit, and how to skooch back so they can have the tape in front of their feet. "Please scoot back a little bit so your fit are not on the tape, but near it.") Once that group was on the carpet, she settled the other 12 children on the other 3 lines (cool how that worked out), and sat down and began talking.

"I have a few stories here that were written by some children in my classroom. This one was written by Joey, and I believe Joey is 4 years old." She begins to tell a story about a mountain lion trying to climb mountains. After she told Joey's story (about three sentences long,) she asked the first boy on her left, "could you please be the mountain lion?" The little boy nodded his head and got up to the middle of the stage. He started walking around in the 'downward dog' position (both hands and feet on the floor, tushie in the air). I think he thought he was a mountain, not a mountain lion. Anyway, Vivian asked each of the three next children if they could each be a mountain. They stood up tall next to each other. Then she said to the mountain lion, "pretend that you are crawling up the mountain", and did a climbing gesture with her hands. The lion did just that, and then Vivian said, "Great. That was a good story. Let's go to the next one."

That's it. No applause, no bowing or standing ovation, just simple closure and continue. I can see where this type of almost nonchalant message helps even the shyest child feel comfortable about participating. It was kind of a "no big deal but let's see what else there is" kind of attitude. Brilliant. This woman is brilliant.

Vivian continued with this same activity, and while this was going on, a little boy began to pull the tape off of the carpet. The children were going crazy. "Teacher, teacher, he's pulling the tape. Teacher look!" Vivian was very busy giving a storyteller her chance to speak, (or maybe just ignoring the children), when finally she had no choice but to acknowledge the problem. She walked over to investigate the situation said something like "Well, it looks like we have a little problem. It looks like you all are going to have to just IMAGINE that there is a line there." She continued on as if nothing was odd about a little boy taking the tape off of the carpet. (Truth be known, there really wasn't anything wrong with it. This little boy wanted to do something while he was waiting, the tape was there, put two and two together people!)

After a few minutes, the little peeler put the wad of tape into his mouth. Off go the child alarms. "Teacher teacher! He's eating the tape!" Vivian slowly looks in the direction of said eater, walks up to him and quietly says, "You can eat the tape, but please don't swallow it." I almost cut a hole in my mouth biting my lip. What a great answer. What. A. Great. Answer. She sent several messages with that one sentence. To the child who was eating the tape, she's telling him that he is OK, that eating the tape is not an awful thing to do (provided it's non toxic) and that the real rule surrounding this is that the tape cannot be swallowed. To the rest of the class she is tacitly saying that everyone belongs in this clas, and just because something odd just happened, it doesn't mean we can all gang up on the odd one. And to the teachers who were observing, she sent the strongest message of all. Relax. Not every odd behavior has to end in punishment or humiliating consequences. This is one great lesson.

I will continue to add more Vivian comments soon. Just wanted to get this one out. See you all soon!

Goin' Back to School!

Our family would get ready for the first day of school the same way every year. The night before school we would watch (or volunteer at) The Jerry Lewis Telethon. My sister and I would spend the evening doing fashion shows and laying out our clothes. Mom always reminded us that the Georgia heat wouldn't go away for at least 6 more weeks and suggested we still wear our summer clothes to school. I never listened to her. Inevitably, the first day of school would find me sweating profusely in my courderoy skirt and long sleeve polyester shirt. I didn't care...I was back at school!

The beginning of September always seemed so exciting...seeing old friends, making new ones, romancing the possibility of changing my identity. Perhaps I would become an athelete this year, or maybe even the homecoming queen. My imagination saw no boundaries as I waited for the bus. I wonder if I should speak only French and make them think I forgot how to speak English.....

This September holds that same feeling of anticipation. Aside from a schedule a bit busier than it was in third grade (this year in addition to my regular 40 hour work week, I'm teaching a college course, teaching a second grade Sunday school class and working on my Masters degree), mostly everything else is the same. I bought some new school clothes, laid out what I am going to where this week, prepared the ziplocks with lunch food, organized my backpack and watched a few minutes of the Telethon for good measure. Come tomorrow I can be anything I want...maybe an athelete...

Live from VERMONT!

This week I have been in Burlington Vermont,(in the middle of New England!) at the University of VT (ww.uvm.edu) for the CAJE conference. This annual conference (www.caje.org) brings together 1500 Jewish educators from all over North America, with spatterings from around the world. The early childhood educators make up over 200 of the participants. That means I met lots of really great people, and we will be seeing new people on this blog! Yay!

So, for my friends who didn't come to CAJE, let me share some of the highlights.
1. There were sessions that demystified the Reggio Emilia approach, Montessori Method and High Scope Curriculum. The presenters were knowledgeable, upbeat, approachable and easy to talk with!

2. I listened to Meir Muller, my new best friend, as he clearly explained how children take in information and concretize what they learn. This guy GETS young children and has such a great way of teaching.

3. The ECE Reflections gave us a chance to discuss the challenge of separating your work life in the shul with your spiritual life in the shul. We talked about interfaith staff and issues surrounding that. We discussed so many timely topics that directors and teachers have.

4. What can I say about Lyndall's session? Should I talk about her fascination with questions? Did you know there were so many types of questions? Did you ever wonder if the questions you ask the children are even appropriate? Do you wish you were in this session??

5. The PEOPLE of the college were the nicest people! Always smiling! I got lost once (OK, not a surprise) and this wonderful student actually walked me the to correct exit and pointed me in the direction I needed to go! Then one time my cell wasnt getting any reception, and i walked out of a session to get a better reception outside. A staff member saw me and just simply offered his phone to me, explaining how his local company has much better service.

6. Food...hmmm... The hot food was primarily white, but the salad bar was always fresh and delicious. Think about it - Pasta, Rice, Potatoes and Fish are all white! Now the VEGGIES stirred into these foods were from local farms, and really yummy!

There were so many great topics and such wonderful speakers. The evening activities were...aw heck, full disclosure: Monday night we went to a drive in theater to see Mamma Mia! Not a CAJE sponsored activity, but way cool nonetheless! But Tuesday night I went to what could be described as a Jewish revival. Great stories, wonderful music, and lots of people enjoying each others' company. I even made friends with 2 people from Baton Rouge! Hi Sue! Hi Jessica!

Tonight I hit the hot tub and relaxed. Leora and I are leaving early in the morning for our 9 hour trek home. My 7 day road trip is coming to an end....I can't wait to see my family and my dog tomorrow night! I'll be home soon, Sheba - arf arf!

What would you do?

Here's a hypothical one for you. I'll give you all a few days to come up with a solution, and then we can talk again. Forward this to fellow grown ups for their ideas. I'm curious to see what the majority says...

A teacher last week who was having a bit of an issue. She has a three year old in her room who loves to take off his shoes. Whenever they go outside, come back in, just hang out, it doesn't matter, this little guy takes off his shoes and socks.

So, on this particular day, she tells him that he needs to put on his shoes in order to come to the table for snack. He refuses. She holds steadfast to the rule. He stays barefoot, and she serves the other children. After a few minutes she tells him that snacktime will be over very shortly so he needs to "come and get it," but to no avail. Then, within minutes of the the assistant taking the snack back to the kitchen, Mr. Born Free quickly puts on his shoes and sits at the table...

What would you do?

Such a great week!

This summer I am working in a preschool a few hours a day. I don't have my own class, I am simply going from room to room, helping out where needed and creating systems to make the teachers' jobs easier. Wow! What fun this has been.

I go into an older 2's room.(Isn't that funny that we call the room older 2's and young 3's? Its not like you hear adults saying things like "well, being an older 45 year old I dont think I should have to do the same taxes as, say, the younger 51's.)

Anyway, their teacher was prepping these guys for going to the pool. She said to them, "we are going to not run, not jump around, and we won't use our hands for hitting." I am watching these kids nodding yes in agreement over and over again as they are listening, and can almost hear them mulling over in the minds, "Run, yes, that sounds like a great idea.. After that I will...hmmm. I know, hit! Thanks for the tip, teach!" I watched them stare at their teacher, repeating the last word of her every sentence. Run.. Hit.. Jump. This converstaion went on and on. Even I was a bit bored. So, being the kind to HAVE to say something, I tell the children, "Maybe we can practice walking safely around the pool. Do you think we can walk safely? What would that mean?" They get up and start showing me what that could look like.

(Big Sigh) I think sometimes the teachers don't always like it when I help....

Like the time I was helping another class that was getting ready for the pool. (Middle aged 3's I think). These cuties were having to wait for the teacher to help them get ready. This was waaaaay boring and I could see some serious behavior issues around the corner. So, being the helpful girl scout that I am, I offered to share in the role of dressing the children. I told this little girl "hands up, get ready, say "pull!"" Upon saying "pull" (which usually got a giggle) I would pull their shirt over their heads. OK, now I have a line of takers. Everyone wants to play "arms up pull" with me. The teacher, not so much. But I think that maybe, just maybe, she learned from my role modeling that even the most mundane routines can be done in an engaging way for these friends. And if she didn't learn...oh well...I had fun!

See you later!

Father's Day Memories

It's not as if I have a million memories of Father's Day itself...more like I have a bunch of memories of my dad. He's still alive, but we don't see each other so much anymore. Yet, today, while thinking about him, I was remembering some of the things he did that helped mold the me I am today.

1. He would encourage me to sing in the car. Not just sing, but "belt it out." He told me there was no difference between me and Barbra Streisand....I believed him. Do I really sing like Barbra? In my dreams...

2. When I was 7 we would toss the baseball around on the back yard. He told me I had the arm of a 9 year old boy. I believed him. In college I tried out for the softball team, certain that my 9 year old arm would get me on the team. P.S. No.

3. When I was 6 we picked up some hitchikers. I was never so scared and dad was not even nervous. He asked them where they were headed, and then told them a better route to get there. He asked them questions about their journey, and by the time they got out of the car, you would think we were all old friends. That spoke volumes to me.

4. For his 50th birthday, I made him a huge card filled with 50 Things to do on Your 50th Birthday! This thing was a labor of love. After he read it a first, then a second time in front of me, he said, "this is such a great card, and I am going to hold onto it for two years." Sorry, dad! I didnt realize you were only 48!

5. When I finally lost a tooth, in order to celebrate, dad took me to Kentucky Fried Chicken. When we were in the car, I told him I thought I could "sniff all the smell out of the bucket" before we got home. Not only did he let me, he encouraged me. I was so sick of that smell by the time we got home I never ate a piece of my own celebration chicken! But I never forgot that he encouraged me to do anything I wanted.

6. I could go on - the Sunday morning bagels and classical music, which has fostered my love of NPR. The 6am dunkin donuts date we had every Friday during my senior year in high school, which fostered my love of sweet fatty carbs. The fact that he had no problem letting us be a house of 4 kids - loud and crazy and hectic and never (in this memory) ever told me to stop being myself. That is what I think brought me to today. You know who was the first to write a comment in my blog? You do now...I love you dad, Happy Father's Day.

Lessons from a swimming pool

The last few days have been great. The Jewish holiday of Shavuot (marking when we received the 10 commandments) was celebrated on Monday and Tuesday, so I had a few days off from work. For me, these days off can only mean one thing - swimming!

We have a wonderful pool area in our community and there are no less then 3000 small children in there at any given moment. Kids in the pool and parents on their chaises....it was an ECE observer's petrie dish!

Now don't get me wrong. I'm not some 24/7 kid voyeure. I don't seek opportunities in my free time to stare at kids. I TRIED to just lay there and get a tan. I TRIED to read my summer novel. I TRIED to swim laps and ignore the little guys. I even talked to a few grown ups in order to keep occupied. But it didn't work. My little eye and my third ear kept listening for and watching for something interesting, something that could give me new insight on children.

What do you think was at the pool? There were children splashing and kicking and playing. There were children screaming and laughing, one was running incessantly (completely disregaring the lifeguard) and others were simply standing in the water, goggles on their heads, staring.

What I saw was a little girl who was excited to see that she could kick her feet and make the water splash. She had no interest in stopping this new activity, even if it meant that she kicked other kids, or splashed another adult. She kicked me on accident. I look up at her, and she stared at me, not knowing what to do. I said, "was that an accident?" she said "uh huh", I said, "well then that's OK keep kicking!" So she did. But I noticed that she kept looking at me while she did it. And she wouldn't stop. It was getting a bit eery. Stop staring at me! What? Do I have something on my face? I got out of the water, just a little freaked out. She followed me with her eyes. What was it that had her attention? If she keeps staring at me I can't observe her anymore. Stop it, kid. That's it, I am going to watch someone else.

The boy who was standing in the water (the shallow end), with his goggles on his eyes, face down in the water. {Actually this reminded my of my friend Ronya's little girl who had her "gobbles" over her eyes, and could not see at all, so she kept crossing her eyes trying to look at us, or would rock her head back and forth like Ray Charles, trying to focus on something. She had us laughing so hard and had no idea why!} Anyway, this guy was staring, face down, into the water. WHAT was he looking at? I had to know. So I swam near him and looked down at the bottom of the pool. Nothing. I went under and opened my eyes. Nothing. The chlorine was really high and my eyes started to burn, but I couldn't stop. I needed to see what he saw. I tried it one more time, and had to stop because my eyes were burning. I looked up. This little guy was looking at me like I had 3 heads. What? I am looking at the pool just like you. Stop looking at me. I was just playing. You don't need to stare at me...

This happened often. Kids in the pool, without their parents, were very active, then when I started to observe them, they would stare me down until I stopped. Fascinating. They don't do that in a preschool. But in school they know their teacher is just a few feet away. At school I am introduced as a friend. But here I am a stalker. Is this an innate defense mechanism? Like a skunk with his smell, these kids offend their predator by staring at them silently until they leave. If they were those dinosaur birds they would have probably spit on me.

So what did I learn? I learned that I really need to be more creative when I observe children. I also learned that there is something on the bottom of the pool...

Read about this teacher!

A friend just forwarded this column to me. You will love reading about this guy. I wonder if he wants to move to Baltimore??


http://teachers.net/wong/MAY08/


Enjoy!

New Book Club Forming!

On the suggestion of a wonderful friend, I am starting a book club for ECE professionals. IF you would like to be a part of the club, simply go to www.facebook.com, join (it's free) and join the club "ECE Teachers book club". We'll take a few days to get the names in place, and then start by deciding on a book and move on from there. Hope to see you there!

Amanda, Max and Ben

My husband Jon is a magician. "Captain Jack the Magic Pirate" performs magic and creates wonderful balloon animals. In my free time, I will join him at an event and do face painting (actually, face stamping - it's faster for little kids). Today was one of those days, and the 3 new friends I made reminded my of why I am in this industry.

Amanda - 3 years old, sporting a pink dress with butterflies on it, pink clogs and a pink headband, wanted a pink butterfly on her face. Once I stamped her face, I showed her that my paint palette had red, yellow, blue and white, but not pink. What should we do? She looked at me very seriously and said, "mix red and that (white), and say a prayer and you get pink!"

Max - 2, all boy,(I could easily imagine that he'd have frogs and rocks and chewed up gum in his pockets) had no time for a stamp on his face, he just wanted to run around. Mom wanted him to have some type of stamp. (Note to parents: If your child has no interest in waiting in line for face stamping or balloon making, let them go play with a friend while YOU stay in line. That will make the overall experience happier for everyone!) Anyway, I digress. I quickly showed Max how my stamp can "kiss" his hand and make a picture. "A bas-a-ball, I have a bas-a-ball on my hand. Do again." I put a stamp on his other hand. Max couldn't believe he had TWO baseballs! He interuppted Captain Jack. "Hi, I have a bas-a-ball" he kept repeating. When Captain Jack saw his excitement, he made Max a huge balloon baseball cap. Max ran up to everyone at the event, showing off his cap and hands. Yet, little Max did not yet understand his physical space limitations, and kept banging into people with this balloon on his head, but it never seemed to bother him. He was a bas-a-ball player, and that was all that mattered.

Benjamin - 4 (maybe 3 - he was small but very verbal.) He'd already had a balloon (pink puppy dog with black nose and big ears), and had two stamps on his hands, (a frog and an alien spaceship) but wanted more. I watched him wait patiently for the balloon and the stamps, (he even let Amanda go ahead of him!) and when there was a lull in my line, he came up and asked me for "one more painting." He decided on a crown, so I asked him if he wanted a king crown or a prince crown. (Note: Was that a gender biased question? Should I have offered Ben the option for a queen crown or a princess crown as well?) Hmmm....

Anyway, Benjamin wanted a "pretty King crown" on his cheek, and when I started to dab on the green gemstones, he asked my what I was putting on his face. "Emeralds" I told him. "Emmeralls" he replied. No need to correct him. It was just too cute for words. I asked if I could hug him because he was so yummy. He said, "Yes, but wait cause the emeralls are wet."

3 new friends, three completely different imaginations. Three different ways of communicating and understanding. How is it that teachers try to use the same curriculum for each child when they are so very different? Just one more reason I love emergent learning!!

Way to go Nick!

My youngest son, Nick, graduated from high school this week. As he was walking to receive his diploma, I was struck by two things: 1) He is very tall, and 2) He figured out the system, and those people up there were giving him a ticket to adulthood. As I looked at my husband to see if he was thinking the same thing, I noticed he had his cell phone up to his ear. "Jon, who are you calling?" He smiles and says, "Nick. But I guess he must be busy!"

Who says that once the kids leave there are no children left at home? :)

Congratulations, Nickel...you did it!

Back to the Beginning

NOTE: This is the original message in my first blog. It can be considered a mission statement. (Who knew that blogs had mission statements??) Anyway, here's my message...


It's time, people.....time to work. I have a goal and I need your help. I want to be the first early childhood blog that has so many members (or whatever they call it), that we draw the attention of the Oprah show.

I can see it now. I get a call from one of her producers. They are working on a segment regarding quality early childhood education, and "well, DJ, your name keeps popping up." We talk about who else could be on the segment with me. I suggest a few people - Bonnie from Childcare Information Exchange (Sorry Bonnie I can never spell your last name... Neugebauer? Neubauer?) Of course, I am online right now and could easily look it up if I really wanted to.

Then the producer suggests we have celebrity parents there. People with young children. I know, Brad Pitt! WITHOUT Angelina. (Not because I don't like Angelina, it's just that if shes not there, and we all take a coffee break, Brad might pull me aside for a few questions, and then it would be just me and Brad, chatting it up over a couple of decaf mocha lattes...) Of course, if Angie comes, I know we'd become fast friends and she will beg me to come over and role model some of my techniques with her kids, and then I would get to go over to their house, and have a bite to eat, hang out, maybe scrapbook a bit with her and Brad...OK, bring Angie too!

OK, back to reality. The truth is, someone needs to be on that show and tell the parents to back off of the preschools so the teachers can do what they know is best for learning. Someone needs to talk about early literacy and the emotional connections children have with learning. There needs to be a representative from the real world to tell these folks to stop pressuring the schools to teach their 3 and a half year old son to read, when what that parent really needs to be doing is helping little Bobby learn to enter social situations with ease. Someone who is not afraid to say it like it is....someone who wants 4 year olds to spend time studying bugs instead of the letter F. Someone who is can handle an inordinate amount of press and fame. You need a 4 year old princess. People, I am your gal! Let me at 'em!

So, what you need to do is forward this blog to everyone you know who loves to be around and work with young children. Parents, grandparents, teachers, family day care providers, your nail lady who has great stories to tell about her three nephews, your vet (people who love animals usually love kids, you know - it's worth a shot!) In return for their subscription to this blog, they will recieve stories that are sometimes funny, sometimes thought provoking, sometimes controversial, but always about kids.

You are invited to my party...

Dear Denise,
For the past 6 months you have been asking me when I would have new stuff on the blog. (www.playforaliving.org). OK, so I gave you a few kibbles here and there. Appetizers, if you will. Little munchies. (These food metaphors are popping up because it's almost dinner time!) I never added things on a regular basis because I was a novice in the blog kitchen. But now, my son Dan taught me all sorts of cool stuff we can do on this blog, and since I have a new home, a bigger kitcher (metaphorically speaking), and better untensils, I am ready to cook! So let's get started!
Thanks for your support,
DJ

PS. A thousand points for you!